FEATURE: Attack on Titan’s 15 Most Underappreciated Titans

 

Everyone’s familiar with the Colossal Titan, the Armored Titan, the Female Titan and the Snazzy Titan (the last of which is a character exclusive to my fanfic, DO NOT STEAL), but there are numerous garden-variety Titans littered throughout the series, too.

 

You know the ones: those without any kind of autonomy whatsoever, operating solely on their ravenous convictions. They enjoy a nosh whenever and wherever possible and they would most certainly love to have you over for dinner.

 

Now that Attack on Titan Final Season Part 3 is rapidly approaching, I figured it was the perfect opportunity to recap some of my favorite Pure Titans along the way. 

 

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Please note that some of the names below are not official, and have been designated by the glorious Attack on Titan fandom or other supporting materials.

 

Please note as well that this list will be littered with spoilers leading all the way up to the end of Final Season Part 2. To be honest, I tried to play coy and avoid naming major characters at first, but it was becoming far too vague.

 

Titans demand certainty, after all. Certainty and tasty human flesh!

 

The “Crawling” Titan

 

 

The first one to work its way to the podium is an unfortunate lug. En route to the coast, Eren and his comrades happen upon this malformed beast, slithering miserably toward the walls. It’s incapable of much more than this, meaning it’s no threat to humans unless they happen to lie down in front of it for some reason.

 

About the only thing crueler than its existence is the fact that the Scout Regiment members don’t even bother putting it out of its misery. At the speed it was going, it probably would have taken it about another 50 years to reach Eldia, and long by then, even the walls themselves would have up and left.

 

You know you’re bad at your job as a gobbly monster when you’re even outpaced by the architecture, but I still can’t help but cheer for the “Crawling” Titan. It’s gonna make it someday, just you wait and see!

 

The “Dauper” Titan

 

 

With so much attention paid to the tremendous Titans — rightfully so, as they will wreck your whole day in a span of seconds — there isn’t much love to go around for some of the little guys.

 

That said, there’s something particularly unnerving about this nasty dude here, who we first see gnawing on a poor old woman in a leisurely fashion. The “Dauper” Titan (whom I must resist the urge to erroneously ordain the “Dapper” Titan) moves with all of the urgency of a drowsing slug; however, its distinctly human proportions and comparatively muted features add an air of menace.

 

It less resembles a Titan than it does a tall, dead-eyed automaton from a horror movie, doggedly pursuing its victims with the sole intention of consumption. Maybe it comes down to its conservative stature or the jarring manner in which it is introduced; we just know for sure that we would prefer this gruesome customer doesn’t pay us a visit next spooky season.

 

The “Jumping” Titan

 

Technically speaking, there are two Titans who have been dubbed the “Jumping” Titan, with the more ballyhooed one making its presence felt in the Trost District invasion. It introduced poor Thomas to the inside of its stomach before setting off to find other cadets to keep him company in there.

 

The “Jumping” Titan I’m picking for this list, however, leaves a different kind of impression. When a trio of Titans suddenly begin sprinting toward the Scouts, this fabulous fellow leads the charge by literally pirouetting through the air. It then gallops across the plains with its arms outstretched as if it was hoping to dry an invisible shirt.

 

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Trying to work out the minds of the Titans is a fool’s errand, so we don’t bother to question why the “Jumping” Titan 2.0 does these things. We’re just thankful that it did, because what it lacks in fighting acumen, it more than makes up for with its incredible grace.

 

The “Party” Titan

 

 

This Titan’s obscurity is such that most will have forgotten it even existed. In truth, it was on screen for all of two seconds before being blasted into oblivion, rendering it one of the most useless Titans to have ever shown its hideous face around Shiganshina.

 

One quick peek at the image of its airtime, however, and I think you’ll understand why it deserves its spot on the list. It is just really, truly excited to be participating in this event, and I cannot shake the idea that it looks like it is raving at the club, or has just walked in on a surprise birthday party.

 

With such unbridled joy on its face, I’m surprised the Scouts didn’t hesitate before incinerating it with a Thunder Spear. Maybe it’s partying on, to this day, in the next life. I can only hope there are more balloons and fewer explosions.

 

Ms. Springer

 

 

Meeting a friend’s parents for the first time is usually pretty weird, but Conny Springer’s mother really takes things up a notch.

 

We first discover this Titan when Conny returns to Ragako, sprawled atop his childhood home in an immobile state. He concludes that his family must have escaped, only for it to choke out ‘welcome home’ in the most loving and yet disturbing manner imaginable.

 

Is this really his mother? Could she have truly suffered such an awful fate?

 

This Titan’s lasting impression isn’t from the mayhem it creates, as much as it is for the heartrending realization that something very wrong is going on here. As it seems to possess some degree of self-awareness, it could technically be disqualified from this list…. Would any ranking of Pure Titans be complete without Ms. Springer, though? She’s not like a regular mom; she’s a cool mom!

 

The “Peering” Titan

 

Vaguely reminiscent of Fleischer-era animation with its enormous eyes, the “Peering” Titan is so called for the memorable scene where it stares upon Mina with a look of stern disapproval. Talk back, get snacked, yo.

 

Typically, this chap is more patient than its cohorts, surveying its target before making its next move. Not only does this make your last moments much more traumatic, it also humanizes it somewhat — as if you could perhaps negotiate with it.

 

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Of course, attempting parlay with the “Peering” Titan sounds like a bad idea to me, but I’m little more than a mere pontificator and I don’t want to yuck anyone’s yum, so if you really want to try it, you’re more than welcome to.

 

Definitely didn’t work for Sergeant Major Gross though, did it? I bet he tasted… absolutely divine.

 

You were expecting me to say gross there, weren’t you?

 

The “Eager” Titan

 

 

Earlier, I mentioned that I had to refrain from referring to the “Dauper” Titan as the “Dapper” Titan, and that is for a few reasons. Chiefly, because it is clerically incorrect, but additionally, if we’re going to anoint only one Titan as being dapper, it is this magnificent lad right here.

 

When Zeke’s roar summons a wave of Pure Titans to run amok in Shiganshina, one, in particular, catches the eye, as it arguably strikes quite a stunning visage. I won’t go so far as to call this Titan attractive, but with its buff physique, trendy haircut, and beaming smile loaded with pearly white teeth… actually, forget what I said before. This thing is attractive, and there’s no getting around it.

 

If you were hiring for a job and the next applicant emerged from behind the corner looking like this, you would at least hear them out before questioning why a 12-foot-tall nudist was standing in your office.

 

The “Gluttonous” Titan

 

Aesthetically alone, this Titan approaches elite status, with its enormous eyeballs that clearly see all and yet probably acknowledge nothing whatsoever (such is the poor comprehension of the Titans).

 

As far as plot impact goes, it’s actually one of the MVPs of the unanointed Titans, landing a critical chomp on Miche that eventually leads to his shocking and gruesome demise. Indeed, it’s one of my favorite scenes in Attack on Titan, which is a testament both to the series’ penchant for macabre storytelling and an admission of my own sick satisfaction when woebegone heroes are gobbled by hungry hordes.

 

A member of the Beast Titan’s crew, this diminutive ghoul pops up more than once and even has a direct interaction with the head honcho, where it is reprimanded for its impulsive tendencies. In other words, the Beast Titan squeezes its head until it goes pop! But it handles the indignity quite well. What a trooper.

 

Zeke’s Escort Titans

 

It’s a hard, fast rule that if a Titan runs funny, I’m probably going to enjoy it. So when these three former members of Levi’s squad blitz through the forest at top speed, each displaying their own unique sprinting form, they were an automatic inclusion.

 

If one were to rank them individually, the middle one is at a disadvantage as it is tasked with securely carrying Zeke. The svelte customer to its left is undertaking a full body workout with powerful arm swinging —which is not only healthy but downright inspirational — but the one to its right, with its fists locked in place, is a true genius of its time.

 

Is it holding an imaginary steering wheel? Or channeling its inner video game mascot by minimizing its animation frames to assist its developers? Whatever its motivation is, the results are quite marvelous. Zeke chose his security team well, before electing to rip them limb from limb and use their body parts as projectiles.

 

The “Bigmouth” Titan

 

We are all the heroes of our own stories and rarely is this quite so apparent as it is with the “Bigmouth” Titan (known in certain circles as the little Titan who could). Despite being nothing more than a short-lived also-ran in the pantheon of Titan greatness, this pipsqueak racks up an admirable body count by putting its substantial maw to good use.

 

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Moreover, it’s the first one to feel Eren’s wrath when he initially assumes his Titan form. A meeker combatant would see the gratuitous size difference as a potential drawback, but not our “Bigmouth” Titan. It leaps right into action like a true warrior, taking Eren to his limit in a narrow defeat…

 

…well, more accurately, he explodes its face with a single punch before stomping it into a bloody pulp. Depends on how you want to frame the situation, I suppose.

 

The “Bearded” Titan

 

By their very nature, Titans devour without discrimination. As such, their exploits are rarely noteworthy beyond “it ate ________,” with that blank space being filled in by whatever anonymous casualty was just claimed by the similarly anonymous Titan.

 

The “Bearded” Titan, however? It manages to sink its fangs into some pretty prime plot real estate by slurping up Eren himself, unwittingly setting off a chain of events that completely alters the course of humanity. Had it not happened to have strolled into Trost District that fateful day, Attack on Titan’s history may be very different.

 

Also, this Titan looks a lot like Santa, so it was a lock for this list anyway. If I sat on its lap, I would probably wish for it not to eat me.

 

The “Falco” Titan, aka Falco

 

 

I haven’t covered many of the major characters when they became Titans, as it kind of defeats the purpose of listing “underappreciated” Titans. Sure; Eren, Armin, and everyone’s favorite lush Dot Pyxis would qualify, but I wouldn’t consider any of them to be underappreciated, exactly.

 

With that being said, Falco gets special mention simply because of how horrifying he looks in his brief time as a Pure Titan. Brandishing an impressive array of chompers and a stretched neck the width of his noggin, he could almost pass for an early Muppet concept.

 

Alas, we only get a few fleeting glances at Pure Titan Falco before he ingests a healthy diet of Porco Galliard, making him the new benefactor of the Jaw Titan. Remember, on the stage and in life, there are no small roles, just small people. Falco was literally neither at this point in time.

 

The “Kinetic Bombardment” Titans

 

When Attack on Titan Final Season Part 1 kicked off with a gripping struggle at Fort Slava between the Marleyans and the Alliance, you knew you were in for a good time. Then, when you thought things couldn’t have gotten any more intense, the Kinetic Bombardment takes place.

 

It’s basically a fancy term for “dropping lots of Titans from the sky and hoping enough of them survive the fall to do some damage,” and to that, it only has about a 50 percent success rate. The ones that do get back up make short work of the hapless soldiers within, aided by Reiner and Porco.

 

Consider it cheating to award an entire battalion in this list if you must, I just couldn’t overlook the spectacle of the moment. If you’d prefer specificity, the MVP is the Titan I selected for the image above. Even with half its face and about 11 teeth missing, it still manages to make a solid first impression by smiling politely at its new friends before munching upon their flesh.

 

Sawney and Beane

 

Alright, I confess, this pair of Titans achieved very little in terms of Attack on Titan’s storyline. That being said, there are so few Titans in this franchise that have actual names, plus a minor arc that spans multiple episodes, so you’d best believe that I were going to highlight them here.

 

For Sawney and Beane, their claim to fame comes as Hange Zoë’s captive test subjects. They’re treated to experiments that range from peaceful sleep pattern observations to having sharp objects prodded into their eyes, so their suffering is for the betterment of mankind… theoretically.

 

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Should two insignificant guinea pigs really rank so highly on this list? Probably not, but would you be the one to tell Hange that they didn’t amount to much? I certainly couldn’t bear Hange’s wrath, so I’ll just proclaim them recipients of the silver medal and be on my merry way.

 

The “Smiling” Titan

 

 

The original eater of mothers and still the best by a long shot. In later seasons, Pure Titans begin to feel more like obstacles than threats, but in the first episode, Hannes can only cower in fear when he comes face to face with this single grinning fiend.

 

The indelible sight of Dina’s calm, almost endearing visage perfectly encapsulates the juxtaposition of these monsters. They operate without animosity, simply gulping whatever happens to be in front of them, carefree to the shrieking protests of their prey.

 

It’s just so eerily fitting that this Titan carrying out its instinctive purpose would have such a lasting effect on Eren…as well as anyone who has watched Attack on Titan.

 

Could this actually be the most iconic Titan in the whole series? Opinions are divided, many would opt for the Colossal Titan, but for my money… this one takes the cake. It then recklessly proceeds to eat said cake, alongside the baker and anyone else who happens to be within reach.

 

Any favorites I missed out on? There are so many more that unfortunately didn’t make the cut (honorable mention goes to the Titan who jogs along with finger guns blazing), so there’s bound to be plenty more to discuss. Let me know in the comments!

 

I’ll see you on the sidelines for Attack on Titan Final Season Part 3! I’ll be standing way, way, waaaaaaaay over there so I don’t get smushed/eaten/glared at by Yelena.

 

 

This article written by Tony Cocking was originally published on the Funimation Blog on November 6, 2020.